Unhappy at Work: Why Do We Stay In Jobs We Hate?

It’s easy
It easier not to change and to carry on with the way things are. It can take a lot of effort to find something else and the search can be a difficult experience. It often involves a series of rejections and so rather than risk the ego it’s easier to do nothing. 

 

Starting Over
A new job involves a steep learning curve. You have to prove yourself, build your credibility, build new relationships and learn new ways of doing things. You go from being the old hand to the new kid on the block.

 

The Devil You Know
People prefer what they know to what they don’t even if it’s not what they like. The risk of going to a job where there’s no guarantee of it being any better, or where it might be worse, is a major barrier to changing jobs.

 

Wait and See…
Many employees stay in the hope that things will improve. Hoping that the manager who is making their life difficult might leave or things will change again if you just wait long enough. There is often a cynicism among longer-term employees of organizational change because they know they will outlast it just like the last time. Sometimes people hold on in the belief that the company will pay you to go i.e. the great redundancy deal.

 

Lack of Confidence
People who’ve been in one job or with one company for a very long time worry that no other employer would actually want them. They also fear that they may not be capable of doing another job or doing as well in another company. 

 

Conflicted Loyalty
Even when people don’t like their jobs they may still feel a strong sense of loyalty or responsibility towards their colleagues and customers. Although they want to leave they feel if they did, they would be abandoning and letting these people down. 

 

Loss of Friendships
People may have forged strong bonds or close friendships with the people they work with. They don’t like the thought of breaking ties and losing friendships.

Loss of Benefits
People realise it will take time before they can accumulate enough annual leave for a holiday. Many companies reward long service with an increased annual leave entitlement, which will be lost in a move to another company.

Financial Lifestyle
Burdened by mortgages, loans, credit card or student debt or nearing retirement some employees feel that they can’t afford to leave their job. Other longer serving or more senior employees with higher than average salaries realise it’s unlikely they’ll find a position with a matching salary and are reluctant to compromise their standard of living.

 

Comfort and Convenience
Even if the job doesn’t fit, the hours of work do or the location may suit their lifestyle. They are reluctant to change jobs if it means a change of hours or a longer commute.

 

Family Commitments
In smaller provincial centres, with fewer employment opportunities, changing jobs may involve relocating which could disrupt a partner’s career and their children’s schooling.

 

No Direction
Many people, who are unhappy in their jobs, lack clear career direction. They don’t know what they really want to do which makes finding another job even more challenging.  When they don’t know what they want they remain in a job even when they don’t like it.

It can damage your health
The dread of going to work every day is stressful and stress can seriously affect your health. It’s time to leave if you’re experiencing stress related illness like frequent headaches or infections, severe indigestion, insomnia or depression.

 

It can damage your career
Your reputation is your most valuable asset. If you’ve lost, or are in the process of losing, the respect of your boss and your colleagues then it’s time to move on.

 

It can damage your relationships
The unhappiness will flow into your professional and personal relationships. An unhappy and unfulfilled person is no fun to work or live with.

 

It can damage your self-respect
Poor relationships at work; the lack of job satisfaction and the knowledge that you’re not living up to or working to your full potential attacks your self-esteem and erodes your confidence. Quit before you lose your self-respect.

 

It’s a Lose-Lose situation
If you take no action, and where your job doesn’t miraculously improve, the loss of your health, self respect, reputation and relationships will create a miserable downward spiral.  The employment relationship may deteriorate to such a degree that the decision to leave will be made for you by your employer.  It is always better to leave on your own terms

1: Identify exactly what it is that’s preventing you from making changes. Once you know you can take steps to manage it.
 

2:  Involve your partner and family. Talk to them about your reasons for quitting, how it will affect them and what you will need to do to find another job.

 

3. Review your finances and manage your budget in preparation for your job search.

4:  Focus on what you want rather than what you don’t want. Consider all your options. Work with a coach or utilise government career and employment services, recruitment agencies and your personal network.

5:  Your job is now to find yourself a job. Pace yourself in your current job but channel all that negative energy into your new job search. Call on the support of your friends and family to help you stay focused and positive. Your health and your family deserve it and your future happiness is waiting for you.